Grumpus does a Half-Ironman! (And feels sore)

Running for the Finish!

Yesterday, I completed a half-Ironman in Providence, Rhode Island. The race started with a 1.2 mile swim in a pond that was followed by a 56 mile bike ride through most of Rhode Island and a 13.1 mile run through Providence.

The weekend started with a visit from Jeff, our good buddy who was in town for a wedding. Because Delta is stupid, he got in several hours later than expected, so we stayed up drinking and catching up well into the night -- at least well into the night by our standards. After a light jog and brunch with Jeff, we headed down to Providence to check me into the race. After checking into the race, we headed to our motel, a Days Inn. The place was ghetto! It was the kind of place that rents rooms by the hour, and it was located in a shady area of North Attleboro, MA surrounded by liquor stores and used car lots.

Since the motel was a dump, we headed to Attleboro, which was "cute" according to Allie. It was so lame that there wasn't even a coffee shop, so we read in a park and headed to dinner at 5:45. We came home after dinner and went to sleep.

I woke up on race morning at 4am, ate a big breakfast and nudged Allie until she was conscious enough to drive me to the pick-up spot for the race bus at 4:40am. As we got into the car, Mumpus saw a couple in the car next to us that laughed and looked surprised when we appeared next to them.  We suspect that something shady was going on, but we can't be sure.

I got to the pond where we were swimming around 5:20, giving me around 25 minutes to put all of the stuff I wanted next to my bike. Once I got to my bike I realized made a big mistake -- I forgot my gatorade and water bottles in the fridge in the room (it was so terrible that, when Mumpus saw them in the room, she thought that I was going to have to bike the entire way without water and expected to get a call from the medical tent during the morning). Without them, I would have had to bike the first 15 miles without any water, which would leave me cramping during the run. So I thought of a solution: I fished into a dumpter, found a used water bottle with a sports top, and filled it up with water I got from other athletes. It wasn't great, but it would have to do.

After many coats of sun tan lotion it was time to swim. My heat went off at 7:05am and because the pond was in the mid-80s, we were not allowed to wear wetsuits. The start of a triathlon is pure chaos -- body parts flying, people getting pulled under, and everyone flopping around. I eventually got some space and cruised through the swim. I almost made a wrong turn since the rising sun was blinding me, but I was fine. I jumped out of the water after 32 minutes and headed for the transition.

I slowly toweled off, got on my bike and headed off! The bike ride was through rolling hills with a few big climbs and one huge climb at mile 29. I could hear the good cyclists coming since their wheels made a whoosh sound as they flew past me. I was able to pass people on the climbs and hold my own going downhill, but people just hammered me on the straightaways. I'm a very slow cyclist by ironman standards, and I finished in 3 hours and 15 minutes. I'm guessing that upwards of 700 people passed me on the bike. During the ride I decided that I was going to train more seriously on the bike before doing another one of these races because it is no fun to have women in their late 40s and men in their 50s punk you on the bike.

Bike to Run Transition in Providence

After a brief and wonderful stop in the port-a-potty, I was off on the run. Before the race I had said that the only thing that scarred me was the off chance that they would route us up the hill/mountain leads up to Brown. Unfortunately, the race started with a 1.5+ mile trip up that hill. It was in the mid-80s, and with no shade on the hill most of us decided to walk up part, if not all, of the hill. It was very, very terrible. The worst part was realizing that I would have to do it again during mile 7 since the course had two loops. I was agitated.

I turned around, came down the hill and saw Mumpus and Naomi cheering for me. I was
happy to see them, but I was tired. I kept chugging along and eventually finished the run, including my second encounter with that hill and two more passes of Allie and Naomi in just under two hours. My

Done, and Tired

overall time was 5:55, which was under my goal of 6 hours. If I do this race again, I'll need to prepare for the hills on the bike and the run in a more serious way so that I don't get punked on the bike.


After I finished I felt tired, so I sat down in the shade. Then, out of no where, Allie gave me a present she found at the RISD gift shop; a new lunch box. It is wonderful, and I love it. Following lunch with Naomi, we headed home. When I woke up today I was sore, tired and very, very sun burnt on my shoulders despite the four payers of sunscreen I applied before the swim.

My Present! A Penguin lunchbox

I was happy to finish, but I'm looking forward to getting back to some more normal adventures.